The inevitable crash

I am not in control anymore

I'm losing these clouds I gathered

the clouds that are supposed to

make this wreck, this crashing plane

land softly

I plant flowers in jars and

behind my eyes,

hoping this speed that is

making my eyes tear up

would water them

make them bloom

I need all the beauty

I can get

for these flashing lights

scare me to death

I want to sit back and

let my world burn so bright

I can lit up the sky

with this flame inside my chest

my black box

Will anyone hear the s.o.s?

Should I scream louder,

fall faster?

I sprinkle these petals

like stars

flickering hope

because it's all I have left

Night sky

My sky looks the same at night

as it does during the day;

when the sun has just set

and the darkness flows

towards everything it wants to own

The comforting weight

of the dim air pushes

through our thoughts

I don't need sunrises

to paint the sky

with bruised colours

nor do I need the light

to find myself

I need this silence

the dusk brings us

It is the only thing

my mind can grasp

Heartsease

Cemeteries with wild flowers

smiling like the queens of it all

conquering man-made stones

Words written on disappearing pages

don't mean much anymore

The candles were burnt out

long before the new life started

And the memories which faded

can now reach a new light

as the blooming beauty picks up

the remains of life

Covers

I lay nude in these words

these pages

that try to cover my scars

I wrap them around me

in the hopes of you

concentrating on the art

rather than finding the real me

A paradox which can

leave us both speechless

When you see

the truth in the poetry

you can see right through me

My truths are disorted

My truths are distorted

I've come to learn

that night whispers

in inverted ways

Paints the nightmares

out of flowers and

delusions out of stars

It took the moribund time

and darkening days

to see the falsehood of it all

Now I'm grasping to

each passing second

all the familiar flickers or light

so I can find my way

through endless labyrinths

of the lies I've created for myself

Hukun

Juon sen kaiken

jos saan tämän tulen

sisälläni sammumaan

Juon meren

sen aallot

siihen heijastuvat tähdet

Juon sen kuin viinin

jotta voin humaltua

sen suuruudesta

ja unohtaa

sisälläni huutavan poltteen

Monsters

Did I bring this madness

this sad theory of everything

onto myself, by myself?

Did I create the monsters

just to have company

in the darkness?

I played with them

from such a young age

that I grew to love them

Now I can't let them go

and be alone again

not again

Unraveling

You made me smile

and that makes me want to

rip myself to pieces

I refuse to long for something

that never even existed

I am on the mercy of these flashbacks

of your heart beating against mine

They pull my heart

like they want to unravel all of it

just for the sake of never looking back

It is easier to forget than remember

Se on valhe

Määrittelen sietokykyni uudelleen

taivutan sen muodostelmaksi

ajatusvirheitä ja eleganssia

Uskottelen jaksavani koko maailman

Kaipaus

Sinun tuoksusi

vaniljaa ja inkivääriä

kietoutuneena tyynyliinani ympärille

Teemukisi edelleen tiskialtaassa

varjosi keittiössä

Kaipaan painoasi päälläni

sitä kuinka voin

kierähtää vierellesi

sielumme toisiaan vasten

alastomina kuin ensimmäistä kertaa

Odotan vain

että voin taas suudella hymyäsi

jotta se tarttuu minuunkin

Kadota minut

Haluan kadota kosketukseesi

kuunnella kuinka kätesi

määrittävät olemassaoloni

piirtävät minut eläväksi

Vajoan allasi

olen mitä vain haluat

Voit maalata minut

niin monin värein

kuin silmäsi tahtovat

kunhan et jätä palaakaan

minusta esiin

Anna minun murtua

painoni alla

uudelleen ja uudelleen

jotta sinun olisi helpompi hengittää